Thursday, February 18, 2010

Scotsman..


One must wondered what has this scotsman got to do with a fellow Malaysians like me... Well.. fret not.. this is not a tribute to the mighty Scotsman... nor i'll be talking about the Picts, Gaels and the Brytons..
This is a documentation of a passing moment frozen in time.. in my mind... and it had such a deep impact to my being.. my being a Malay as a race and Malaysian in nationality...
and the story goes like this.....
After a long day at the office.. i was on my way back... I always park my car at an open car park opposite of this mighty office building.... I do enjoy the brief walk in the morning.. stopping by at the makcik's stall by the roadside to buy some kueh for my breakfast.... and risking my life crossing the busy street with cars buzzing by...
and now, i had just crossed the road and walking towards my car... in this area, tourist are a norm... and at times, there a hundreds of them across the street gawking at this mighty building... the tallest twin tower in the world as claimed...
At dusk, there's not so many people in the streets.. especially walking on the sidewalk.... and there he is.... i saw from afar... an Old Scotsman.... In full Scottish Regalia in this hot and humid Malaysian weather..
The green twill worsted wool kilt.... hold by the kilt pin.. white Ghillie Shirt and brown barret... socks to the knees and black shoes. and an a walking stick elaborately carved.. he was limping a bit of which explains the need of the walking stick .. perhaps he's in his late 60's or early 70's.....
It had taken me by surprise.. never in my life.. well in Malaysia i see people wearing kilts and such... its definitely not an everyday sight for sure....
So i continued my walk.. albeit slowy towards him... and as i passed him, i smiled.. I really wanted to compliment on his full ensemble.. but nothing came out from my mouth..
He stopped walking... and look at this mighty building.. as i passed him, i can see that he was so intrigued by this building.. he took his time scanning the building with his eyes.. its was beaming... then he smiled.. the smile of great satisfaction.. and proud i might say.. if only i can read his mind.....
A few steps away from him, i too stopped in my track... i turn back facing this mighty building and looked at it... It was gleaming.. bathed in lights.... it almost looked like a clear diamond or crystal.. piercing through the sky... with the orange and bluish sky as the backdrop, it was the most beautiful sight in the world.... and without realising it, tear began to form in the crevices of my eyes.....
Sometimes we do take things for granted... as i'm in this building every working day, i tend not to appreciate the beauty of this building.....
This man.. perhaps travelling half the world to find this building... magnificently standing in front of him, he was mesmerised.. the beauty transcends beyond boundaries.... It has its own languange.. which is the universal language of beauty.....
and day by day, i'm beginning to be more appreciative of what we have... as the old scotsman in his full regalia proud to show the world of his heritage, i am proud of being who i am.. being a Malay.. and Malaysian.......
and it takes a GREAT SCOTSMAN for made me realised that..... :)

Monday, February 15, 2010

Valentines...

One of my birthday wishes last year is to find love before i'm 30.... It was in June... by September, i got to know somebody and by November ....i did found love.... :)

It was definitely not love at first sight.. You see, previously, i had this pre-conceived notions on how my other half would be.. I have this set of *rules* in my mind.. i live by it.. i breathe by it and swear that i will only want a person with those qualities..and without those set of qualities, it'll be impossible for me to love.. or even fell in love with that person in the first place...

However, it all went down the drain... the moment i met this person... At first glance, physically this person is soo not my type... even my friends said so... at that time i didn't know how's that person like in real life....

One fine day, by chance we met... Sparks didn't fly... mutual pleasantries were exchanged and favours were met... i did a favor by helping send that person back to the office... and along the journey we talked...

A few hours and a glass of pasembal tea later, having quite good conversation ..we parted our own ways... and promised to have a proper date next time.... I had this rule in my mind.. if a person likes me after the first meeting, that person will text or call me first.. i was not really counting on it at first.. after i closed the door.. drove a block, i received an sms.... it was from that person.... asking for a date with me the next day... and i agree... hesitantly at first... the only thing why i did agree was because that i think i can hold a decent conversation with this person... :)... so we went out the next day... and the next day.. and the next day and the rest is history......

The thing why i like this person is, because this person can accept me for who i am.. i know it sounds cliche.. but yes.. it is really true.. this person have seen me when i'm with my friends and this person knows how i'm like.. my mood swings.. my incoherent ramblings... everything.. and this person can accept it and LOVE it even more......

Look, when we are in relationship, we tend NOT to be ourselves... we tend to be the person whom we thought that this person will like.. and in that process, we didn't actually know whether this person likes us for who we are or likes the character that we are charading around.. pretending to be this perfect person... whilst we're not!!!!.... and let me tell you that i've been in that kind of relationship... it is tiring and this person will eventually know that you are not your true self..still, those type ofrelationships can survive.. albeit for a short period of time.....

I'm not making myself into another Oprah.. haha... I can tell you 1001 reason why i cant be with this person.. the things that annoys me the most and there's LOTS of them.... and i bet that this person feels the same way bout me as well.. haha...

But in the end.. its true.. its not the looks that counts.. its not the body nor the size...its not the pockets that counts..

Its the effort.... both parties effort to keep this going.. effort to maintain the relationship.. effort to sustain the relationship.... and the support that were given on both sides....

It is that simple... as we can know when a person is really into us, that person will make effort...

However, the journey is still long...eventhough it has only been a few months *3 months to be exact*.. it has been the longest relationship that i've ever been ..... haha...

So thats it. although we don't celebrate Valentine's Day.. I know that this person will always be MY Valentine... *well at least until next Valentine hopefully.. haha*

p.s: flower's so overrated..give me chocolates anytime!!....

Tuesday, February 09, 2010

Stimulation

I need somebody who can stimulate me physically and also mentally...

Please la.. dontcha dare makes stupid jokes when im having my lunatic rants.. there's a point that im trying to say......... but its hard if you don't actually bother to understand it....!!!

Don't bull shit me by saying thats nothing wrong with me...... I'm not a goddamn STEPFORD WIFE!!!....

arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!

Monday, February 08, 2010

GYM..MING???


Well.. late last year, i decided that i should start goin to the gym.... I felt that my weight is now at a critical level .. my pants is now size 40!!!.. and my weight has reached 3 figures!!!..
Since i started working which is about 4 years ago, i've gained more than 20kgs...... I'm lethargic / tired most of the time.. and the most excersicze that i have at office is walking from my workstation to the water cooler which is about 20 metres... walking from carpark to the my office *berhenti kejap kat makcik tepi jalan beli nasi lemak*... and at home, from my sofa to the fridge to get more food!!...
so after much thinking., i've made up my mind.... i have to start excersizing.. im gonna be 30 soon and if i don't start taking care of my health, god know what kind of disease i will get when im older... nuff said!!
I have friends who regularly goes to gym *yes edan.. thats you!!*.... teehee.... and after much consultation, deliberation, hesitation and "tion" yang lainnya, i've decided to join Fitness First..... near to the office and lots of hot people.. hehehe *tetap ada ulterior motive githoo*
So i join.. to make the long uninteresting story short, reluctantly, i joined. i started to go 3 to 4 times a week.. no trainer as i can't afford that now.. so i do the workout on my own... the first month, i've lost 2 kgs... *wohoooooo*.. tuhan saja yang tau betapa perasaan best sangat masa tu*.. berangan kejap body lawa....hahha.. padahal masih gemuk..
2nd month i've lost 1 kilo .. oklah.... eventho i've been goin to the gym quite regularly, i still feel that i have to drag myself everytime... whylah i don't have the motivation to go.... im losing weight and it show but sumhow, i dun really feel motivated to go.... and thats really a big thing....
Now for the past 3 weeks, i've stopped goin.... at first, it was because i have other commitments everytime i wanna go... then as time goes by, i'm just not motivated anymore.... but sumhow the guilt is quite overwhelming still....
i know that i have to start goin to the gym again..... but izzit worth it.. paying so much for something that is uncertain....
sigh.......

Friday, February 05, 2010

Latest of me... im still alive..



This is me... latest.. !!

Wow.. dah lama gila dah tak update blog nih.. nampak gayanya i didnt get to maintain the promise that i made to myself .. which is to update this bolg more often..... darnnn......

me at brinchang, Cameron highland

Btw, much thing has happen in the past year....

but now i am happy.. well happiness is always subjective ...

but generally im happy.. will update more when i have the time *since curik2 update from the office*.. pleaseee.. jangan tuduh meks takder keje occay... hehehe....

I LOVE MY LIFE!!.. *mampu tak berkata begitu*... hehehe....

Ciao...